Americans have gotten so politically correct or maybe it has roots back to the days of prohibition when we had to hide our drinking or maybe back to the creation of the martini. A straight shot of hard alcohol given a fancy name in a fancy glass to remove the stigma of asking for a tall glass of 90proof alcohol. Most people didn’t feel right saying to a bartender “may I please have a tall glass of vodka. I don’t want ice in the glass taking up space so please shake it with some ice to make it cold and just poor the straight liquor in a glass so I can get hammered as quick as possible and can I get a side of olives to kill the after taste”. It sounds much better to say “may I have a dirty vodka martini, extra dry, up with extra olives”. That is the kind of drink you can drink with your pinky in the air right in front of your boss or your mother.
On this Cinco de Mayo I think of all the events, celebrations and holidays that we have created as excuses to drink; Cinco de Mayo, St. Patrick’s day, New Year’s eve, Superbowl Sunday, the Kentucky Derby, baseball games, football games, softball games…heck, all sporting events except Hockey (we’ll give the Canadians credit for that one)…birthday parties, family barbeques, fishing, weekends, funerals, marriage (just kidding Temple…but wait…why do you drink when I come home??? I digress).
I do think it is great that when we run out of reasons, we just start blaming other people. Well, it is May 5th officer, I had to drink thanks to the Mexicans. It is their fault. Don’t piss us off Canada or we’ll give you a drinking holiday, other than the Stanley Cup.
In all deference Douglas Adams(The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy), the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything is not 42….it is, as I see it, beer.
Which leads me back to loving the Irish. We don’t play the blame game. We need no excuse to drink.
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